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ElsewhereSometimes, I just don't want to
be touched. Sometimes my skin
aches for a brush of flesh on flesh
even so much as a single brush
casts a blush of pink on my cheeks.
But not now. Now I am being caressed
by the vibrations of the bass that echo
through my bones, stronger than your grip
You yank my flesh, but my mind is
AnonymousThe man I pass by on my way
to Starbucks who stiffens up
and smiles at me as he rests
on his shovel and wipes his
brow, does not know anything
about who I am,
or what I've been through and I
I am nothing but anonymous.
A Little LessYou know what you did, and that is
all I ever wanted to know, to hear
you say I'm sorry but an apology
only goes so far. It wont ever fully
heal, but it's a start.
I don't strive for a relationship
nor even a friendship, or any contact
really, I just want to be okay,
and knowing you know how badly you
hurt me makes me hurt
a little less.
StatueI sever myself from my body
Become a concrete wall
Under the delusion of animation
Where tears never fall and
Nothing bad ever happens
And I wonder if I'll ever have the courage
To join myself and my body
'Unite them' he says
I want the whole you
But even his hammers can't crack
The Things I Will SeeI will see people fall in
and out of love
and people find fascination
because of it.
I will see the days grow
shorter, and longer, shorter
I will see young faces grow
old, wrinkle like old leather
boots, dirt-stained, with rusty
I will see the rust spread
and life fall from your eyes.
The LotteryI won the lottery of destroyed dreams
but I still won the lottery.
I won buckets of tears, and millions
of people's last chance.
I won the final dollars of a last
welfare check, spent on a whimsical
wish to be able to take care of that
baby girl who lies awake, only six months
already able to fall asleep
to screams of sirens
I won all of that.
Every last penny spent on a hopeful whim
a fantasy that one day they'll have
the means to fix the leaking roof.
Death isn't a fresh perspectiveI saw my mother
swallowing something small
when I was just a child
The anguish in her eyes
faded, as she told me
it was just a
with a little extra kick
maybe years later,
that's how I convinced
to swallow fifteen,
give me a fresh perspective;
in the end,
my breath reeked
instead of mint.
Our Captain (Robin Williams Remembrance Poem)Oh, Captain
We’ve never had,
A Friend like You.
You came to us as an Alien,
from the Planet Ork.
But through the Years,
You made Home in Our Hearts
We Saluted You over the Airwaves
We Watched You get Sucked in a Game,
And Haul Your Family in the Big Rolling Turd.
You were a British Nanny,
Who was actually their Dad.
A Business Man,
Who was actually Peter Pan.
A Crazy Scientist,
Making a Being called Flubber.
Who Just Wanted to be Free.
You were a Robot,
Made of Rusty Old Parts.
We’ve never had,
A Friend like You.
You became the Man of the Year,
And the Wax Figurine Exhibit
Of the Twenty-Sixth President
Of the United States of America.
You Were the World’s Greatest Dad,
And the World’s Greatest Therapist.
You Had a License to Wed
And be a Kid,
Who Grew Up Four Times Too Fast.
You only Won One Oscar.
But that’s okay.
We Love all Your Other Works Anyways…
We Will Miss You
to a crucifix
on the left side
of his neck
tells me he can end all
of your suffering -
and i look at him
and i cross my arms, thinking
he can't even do this
DoormatI let you walk
All over me
Like the floor
Beneath your feet
And I never complain
The floor doesn't
If the floor complained
When you walked on it
You would be very annoyed
And you would probably
So I don't complain
Because I don't want
To be replaced
And I let you
Push me around
Like a cart
Through a shop
And I never push back
The cart doesn't
If the cart pushed back
When you pushed it
You would get hurt
And you would probably
So I don't push back
Because I don't want
To be left alone
Now, and forever more
Who lets you
Wipe your feet on my face
I love you
But I question
If you love me back
Because who would love
A dirty old Doormat?
It Trapped Her, It Released HerWhen I was younger, and little girl, I wanted a little brother.
So when she got home, I excitedly ran down stairs to tell my mother
She looked at me nervously, and brushed my question away.
“Honey, I don't have time now, we'll talk about it another day.”
I was slightly disappointed because my friends all had younger siblings,
I only had an older sister who tried her best to ignore me.
But that day she heard what I asked my mother and after dinner, pulled me in her room.
And with a sneer she whispered silently, “Mother sent our little brother to heaven too soon.”
At the age of nine, with a child's mind, I had no idea with that meant.
“Is that why Daddy went away, because he misses him?”
“Daddy got depressed and died,” she replied with a scowl,
“But don't be sad, he's in the clouds, he's with our brother now.”
Days went by and I remained silent,
yet I could see the light in my mother's eyes no longer lit.
After my question she w
I died todayI died today
Took my own life
I was tired
I was desperate
And now I'm dead
People never cared
So I left them behind
Now a new life awaits
Beyond the gates of Hell
Breathing RoomI leave chrysanthemums
scattered at your feet on tile floor
like the pencil shavings piled
on your desk.
"The flower of death,"
with Rorschach roses on your knuckles
and the hint of a warrior
in the line of your lips,
you sketch bears with open jaws
and black-shadow eyes
in the margins of your math book
with permanent ink.
The hooded abyss of your gaze
you can't bring yourself to say:
Love is short
and prone to fading.
It's a good thing I don't mind breathing life
into negative spaces.
SkinnyI wish you'd believe me,
When I tell you you're pretty,
That you don't need to skip a meal or run 7 miles,
Just so you can be skinny,
You talk about how you hate yourself,
You wish you could be stunning, beautiful, gorgeous.
You think that if you looked like a model,
That you'd never be lonely,
Everyone would love you.
You think you d get that guy you ve been dreaming of,
Maybe mommy and daddy wouldn't be so harsh if they had a pretty little girl.
You re skin and bone,
But that is not good enough,
You need less and less,
And every pound that disappears,
You begin to lose yourself in a vicious cycle.
Until you re consumed and it eats away at you.
I beg you to listen to me,
I want you to know that you mean everything,
But you don't care,
And then when the ambulances came,
And carried you away...
There was nothing more I could say...
I guess you were unaware,
That you were already beautiful.
AnaBreakfast is the first to go
then lunch..... then snacks....
and then dinner fades..... into nothing.....
you'll hate the sharp pain in your stomach....
for the first few days at least,
but then you'll learn to love it....
The excuses come rough at first
they'll start to suspect something.... if you don't
do it right, if you don't make it believable
"it's okay, I already ate"
"I'm not hungry"
"I have to study"... and so on and so forth
And one day they will take you out
to eat, for his birthday or something...
and you'll cut your food into tiny bites....
"I can't eat all of this" you think
even if you tried.... your stomach has shrunken down
with the rest of your self,
you'll eat though.... just to make them happy.
"Excuse me, I have to use the restroom"
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Endorell-Taelos is very well known within the community for her selfless giving and gracious community spirit. Since joining DeviantART over seven years ago, Alicia has continued to make a positive impact on many deviants. Her helpful and thoughtful approach was one of her finest attributes when serving as a Community Volunteer, and this has continued throughout the many contests which Alicia provides on a regular basis. As we approach our Birthday celebrations, we can't... Read More